5 Valentines
by woodrosegirl
Summary: 5 Valentines Days in the life of Torvill and Dean.
1. First Valentines

_First Valentine_

I sit at my desk, bored by my work and counting down the minutes until it's time to go to the rink. The only excitement I've had at work recently is the arrival of a boy slightly older than me, Michael. He was confident, and sure of himself….completely different to me, yet I was attracted to his good looks and nice smile. I'd been shyly trying to flirt with him for a few weeks; this week was Valentines day, and I'd secretly been hoping that he might ask me out on a date. I'd never been on a date before, and the only boy I spent time with was Chris.

Valentines day fell on Wednesday and today was Monday. I stare at the pile of papers on my desk, willing for them to go away when I notice Michael approaching my desk.

"Hi" he says.  
"Hi"  
"I was wondering….if you, would perhaps want to go out with me on Wednesday, after work."

He flashes me a brilliant smile.

For a moment I forget how to speak.  
"I'd….I'd love to" I manage to stutter out. Then I remember. Practice at the rink with Chris.  
"But I can't….I mean…not straight after work. I have to practice until about seven"  
"That's fine" he says. "I'll meet you outside here at seven"

I shyly nodded and he gave me another smile. I tried to remain calm, but inside I felt like I was going to burst. Attractive, cool, and confident Michael had asked me out on a date and I couldn't believe it.

On Wednesday morning, I carefully fold up the dress I had chosen to wear into my skating bag, along with heels, and some make up. At work, I was so pre-occupied by the impending date that I couldn't focus on my work. Luckily, the day went fast, and before I knew it I was at the rink. Chris turns up just as I'm lacing up my skates at the side.

"Hey you" he says, flopping down beside me with his skate bag.  
"Hey yourself"  
"How was work?" he asks.  
"It was….quick"

He looks confused for a moment then shrugs and I don't explain further. I study him, while he pulls on his skates. I couldn't deny his good looks, and I also couldn't deny that I was attracted to him. Trouble was, he had never shown any romantic interest in me. His voice snaps me out of my reverie.

"You ready?"  
"Oh. Yeah sure"

He gives me another funny look but doesn't say anything. We start the practice, but after an hour and a half things aren't going as well as hoped. Added to this, I was checking my watch constantly, mindful of finishing on time, and eventually, Chris, who was seemingly fed up stopped the practice.

"I think we need a few more hours at this" he says, once we've skated to the barrier.  
"Chris, I can't. Not tonight"  
"Why? And why do you keep looking at your watch?"  
"Chris. Think about what day it is"  
"Wednesday….February…14th. Oh. It's Valentines Day….what do you have a date or something?"

I know he's teasing so it surprises him when I answer.

"Yes. Actually I do"  
He looks slightly taken aback but I just continue.  
"I need to leave in half an hour"  
"Oh…I thought…that you…."  
"Wouldn't have a date? Other men do find me attractive you know" I snapped, and instantly regretted it when I saw his face.  
"I…Sorry" I stammered. "I didn't…I didn't mean to…sorry"  
"It's okay" he mumbles, but I know it isn't.  
"Look" I sigh, "How about I call him and arrange to meet an hour later….give us more time to work"  
Chris looks up.  
"If you're sure?"  
"Yeah, just give me a minute"

I pop my skate guards on and clunk upstairs to use the rinks pay phone. Michael agrees to meet me later, but changes the location to outside the rink.

When I return Chris and I set about continuing our practice and, after another half an hour everything seems to start coming together and we have a productive last hour. A glance at my watch at the end of our routine confirms that it's time for me to go and get ready.  
"I need to go" I inform Chris and he releases me from his hold. I skate over to the barrier, and turn around, puzzled as to why he hasn't followed me.

"Aren't you coming?" I shout over to him.  
"I'm going to practice on my own for a bit"  
"Kay"

Turning away from the rink I clunk over to the changing rooms and change out of my training gear into the outfit I had so carefully chosen earlier. Smoothing my dress down I apply a little make-up and fix up my hair. I felt so nervous, but I was hoping it didn't show. I hadn't felt so nervous since the day I first met Chris. My heart seemed to quicken at the thought of Chris, but I told myself sternly.

"He doesn't find you attractive" I say to myself. "You're skating partners, nothing more"

Slipping on my heels I grab my stuff and head back towards to the rink, waving Chris over to say goodbye.

"Wow" he says. "You look….wow"  
We both blush.  
"Sorry" he says. "You just look…amazing"

I was shocked. He'd never complimented me on my looks before.  
Embarrassed, I said thanks and made my way outside.  
I expect to see Michael waiting for me but there's no-one waiting so I sink down into the bench next to the rink and wait. After a nervy 15 minutes there's still no sign of him.

"He's probably running late" I tell myself. However after another ten minutes I find myself checking my watch constantly, to make sure I have the time right, and after another 15 minutes the realisation that he's not coming hits me and the hot, angry tears come.

"How could I have been so stupid" I think. "How could I have thought that a handsome, cool and confident guy could be interested in quiet, mousy me?"

I hear the rink doors open and close and I try to wipe the tears away. I hear familiar footsteps and I know it's Chris. I hear the footsteps get closer and I feel him sit beside me but I don't look up.

"Please. Just don't say anything like 'I told you so'"  
There's a silence which is broken when he say's quietly.

"I wouldn't" then "Are you okay?"  
His words are enough for the tears to carry on falling and I manage to choke out.  
"No. Chris I'm not"  
He doesn't say anything so I continue.

"How could I think that someone would want to go out with me…I mean…he probably did it for a bet or something….dare you to ask out the quietest, ugliest girl in the office….and I fell for it…I thought he liked me….for me"

I hear Chris sigh.

"You're not ugly, far from it"  
"What would you know" I mumble through the tears. "You don't fancy me"  
"Oh Jayne" he sighs. "If only you knew…."  
"If I knew what?"

I look up and he tilts my face towards his so I can look into his eyes.

"You are, the most attractive girl I have ever seen….not to mention the strongest…and the nicest…and…"  
"You don't have to lie" I say.

He chuckles and slips his arm around me.

"I'm not, Jayne you are absolutely stunning, you don't know how nervous I still get around you"  
My wet eyes meet his.  
"Really?"  
"Really. I just…..well….you know….we're skating partners.."  
"I know" I say quietly.  
"Well, how about this. I take you out tonight. You look stunning, and it's a shame to waste it…and every Valentine's Day, if neither of us have anyone…we'll go out together…as friends, skating partners…whatever we are…deal?"  
"Deal" I say, finally smiling.  
He hugs me close to him and places a soft kiss on my cheek.  
"Happy Valentines Day Jayne"


	2. Double Date

_Double Date_

"Jayne, what are you doing for Valentine's day?" My mother asks, a few days before.  
"Dunno" I shrug. "Probably spending it with Chris, why?"  
"Is he taking you out on a date?"  
"No…..not so much as on a date….just as…friends…skating partners….whatever"  
My mother sighs.  
"That's just it Jayne…oh I don't know….you've been…pardon the pun, skating around each other for years now"  
"So?"  
"So…..me and Tee think that you should meet other people"  
"Oh no" I say. "What have you done?"  
"We haven't done anything, it's just that we've taken on this nice boy at the shop….and I thought it might be nice if he took you out"

My jaw dropped.

"On a date? On Valentine's day?"  
"He seems very keen" my mother interjected. "Look, it's just one date Jayne, it won't hurt to go and meet someone else"  
"A blind date? A blind date. On Valentine's day."  
"Yes. And you're going. It's only polite"

My mother said that firmly, and I knew that it was the end of the conversation. Little did I know, a few streets away, Tee was having exactly the same conversation with Chris. When I met him later on, at the rink, he looked as glum as I felt.

"You okay?" I ask, as we lace up our skates.  
"Not really. Tee's meddling"  
"In what way?"  
"You won't believe this…she's set me up…..on a blind date…"  
"…On Valentines day" I finish.  
He looks at me surprised. "You knew?"  
"No….my mums done the same thing to me"  
"What? You're kidding?"  
"No"  
I started to laugh at the absurdity of the whole situation.  
"She's set me up with some boy from the shop? You?"  
"Some girl that lives near me"

Now Chris started to laugh.

"We both have blind dates…on Valentine's day…I can't believe our parents have done this…Where are you meeting your…"  
He mimics air commas.  
"…Date?"  
"Bridges at seven….you?  
"Bridges…at seven" he says slowly.  
"So it's a double blind date" I say.  
"Seems like it….what are they up too?"  
"Dunno"  
"Why can't people just let us be us?" Chris grumbles.  
"I don't know" I sigh. "Well, at least we'll have each other"  
He leans over and gives me a squeeze.  
"Yeah" I say, suddenly feeling quite distracted at the thought of seeing Chris with another girl. He notes the look on my face.  
"You okay?"  
Quickly, I push it to the back of my mind. And, completely oblivious to me, Chris was having the same thoughts running through his mind.

"Jayne! Peters here!" comes my mother's voice.  
"Five minutes!"  
I was being careful with my appearance. Not because I was worried about what Peter would think, I (selfishly I supposed) wanted to look better than Chris' date.  
"Jayne!"  
"I'm coming!"

"So you guys skate together?" says Peter as soon as we all sit down.  
"Yeah" I say. "Have done for…."  
"Three years" Chris supplies.  
I note Chris's date. With a far too short dress on, and too much make up, I felt relieved. I knew that Chris wouldn't be interested.  
"So, like a hobby…or full on?" Peter asks.  
"Pretty full on" I answer.  
"Like a career?"  
"Yes" Chris answers. "We hope"

There was an awkward silence which I try to fill.  
"So Peter….what do you want to do?"  
"I'm going to be an accountant"  
Chris looks puzzled.  
"Don't you work in their shop?"  
"Yes, but that's only part time, I also go to college. I only work in the shop to earn money. When I'm an accountant" He pauses to look at me. "I'll be making a lot more money"  
"Well" Chris says. "Money isn't everything"  
Peter snorts derisively. "The only people who say that are people who don't have any money. I mean, how much money are you going to make_ skating_"  
Chris's face turned red, with both anger and embarrassment.  
"It's not about the money" I say, hoping to diffuse the situation. "It's about doing something we enjoy, and are passionate about." I looked at Chris.  
"Exactly" he said. "There is no greater joy than skating with Jayne"  
Now it was my turn to blush, and I looked down.  
"I wouldn't care if it made us no money, just as long as I could…."

I looked up to find Chris gazing at me intently, and all of a sudden the walls and the surroundings seem to melt away, and it was just me and Chris.

"…Just as long as I could skate with her forever"  
"Me too" I say, softly.  
Unfortunately, the moment was broken by Peter. "Well I think you're both crazy. I wouldn't dream of doing anything that wouldn't earn me money"

That's it. I thought. I've had enough of this.  
"I just forgot" I say standing up. "Chris and I actually have a practice session that we should be attending"  
I shot Chris a look.  
"Yes" he hastily says, standing.  
"You're leaving?" Peter says.  
"Yes, sorry" I say, grabbing my jacket and bag.  
"Suit yourself" he said airily. "If you'd rather skate then have a nice dinner…."  
I felt ready to explode, but Chris had seen the signs.  
"Yes, yes she would!" he says, grabbing my hand and leading me away.  
"Bye" he says, over his shoulder.

Once outside, I exploded. "That! That arsehole!" Chris started to laugh.  
"At least your date spoke"  
"I'd really rather that he hadn't" I grumbled. "Why? Why did my mother think that he was date-material?"  
Chris shrugged. "Don't know, I feel like asking Tee the same thing"  
He leads me to a bench, and we sit. "What was her name? Claire?"  
"Clara" I confirm.  
"Whatever it was, that was disastrous"  
"Not as bad as mine"  
"Yes, you win, your date was much worse then mine"  
It's still early, but there's a chill in the air that makes me shiver.  
"Cold?"  
"Yeah, a bit"  
"Here"  
Chris drapes his coat around my shoulders. "Better?"  
"A bit"  
The warmth helped, but I was still shivering.  
"Come here" Chris says, and pulls me into his arms. Snuggled into his chest, his warmth stops me shivering.  
"What a crap evening" I sigh.  
"I don't know, it's not over yet" Chris says.  
"What do you mean?"  
"I mean….Jayne? Will you go on a date with me?"  
I move out of his arms and look him in the eyes.  
"Yes. That would be perfect"

He takes my hand and we go to a small Italian restaurant. Afterwards, Chris walks me home, hand in hand. When we get to my house we turn and face each other.  
"I wonder if Clara and Peter had a nice date" he says, making me giggle.  
"Well….maybe they didn't but….I had a wonderful time"  
"I'm glad" he says, moving closer to me. His face is so close to mine that I can feel his hot breath. His hands move up and down my sides and my breath quickens at the contact. I move so that our noses are touching and I just know that we're going to kiss.

"Chris?" I say, my breath catching. "Are we…going to…"  
"…Yes" he whispers. "If you…"

His words are lost as he leans down and softly caresses my lips with his. He puts his arm around my waist and softly continues to touch my side, making me moan slightly at the contact. He seems pleased with my reaction and kisses me deeper, our tongues sliding together. Everything feels like it's in slow motion, and it seems that we stand kissing for hours. Eventually, we naturally break apart and he pushes a strand of hair back behind my ears before kissing me on the forehead. As we silently gaze at each other, everything suddenly seems so perfect. After a few minutes, he breaks it.

"I should…..should be going"  
"Yeah….me too"  
"I don't want to though" he says, lacing his fingers through mine.  
"Nor me" I confess. "But my parents….."  
"I know….I'll see you at the rink tomorrow"  
"Of course"

I turn and start to walk away from him, but I'd only got a few steps when I heard my name.  
"Jayne?"  
I turned back.  
"Thanks for an amazing Valentine's day"  
"And you"  
I turned back, and walked towards the house, beaming. As I start up the stairs my mother shouts out.  
"How was your evening?"  
"Perfect"  
"With Peter?"  
"No!"

I ran up the rest of the stairs and sink down on my bed. My lips were still tingling from where we had kissed.  
"Happy Valentine's Day Chris"


	3. Bolero

_Bolero_

As I sit in my room the routine washes over me every time I close my eyes.

_Skate guards off, hand them to Chris. Hold Chris's hand. Deep breath. Step onto the ice, left boot first. Skate into the middle…._

I open my eyes. I knew every millisecond of our routine yet I couldn't get the visualisations of it out of my head. Sighing, I sit up and glance at the clock, it showed 5 hours to go. I was trying to sleep away as much of the time as possible, but so far it wasn't working. Idly, I let my mind wander to Chris. I so desperately wanted to go to him, wanted him to hold me, calm my nerves. But we had a strict rule about not seeing each other before a competition. And this was the biggest competition of our lives. I knew what he would be doing. He'd be watching the hours go by, maybe trying to read a book, maybe, like me, trying to get Bolero out of his head.

I re-arranged my pillows and, flopping back on them I re-shut my eyes and tried to drift off. The notes of Bolero tried to infiltrate my mind, but I shut them out, and this time it worked as I fell into an uneasy sleep. A knocking at my door woke me up with a start. I glanced at the clock, which confirmed I'd been asleep for just over an hour. Bleary-eyed from the short sleep I go over and open the door. I'm shocked to see Chris on the other side.

"Hi" I say. "Is everything okay? We don't usually see…." He cuts me off.  
"I know. But I had to see you…can I come in?"  
"Sure" I stepped aside and I noticed he was holding something behind his back.  
"What's that?" I asked curiously, and he blushes.  
"Well…..in all this Olympic whirlwind, I nearly forgot what day it is"  
It took me a while to realise.  
"Oh Chris….I completely forgot"  
"It's okay…so did I" he admits. "It's only a small something…" he moves his hands from behind his back and hands me an orchid.  
"Oh Chris….it's beautiful….I didn't get you anything"  
"You don't have too. I just wanted to give you something special.  
"It's lovely Chris. Thank you. So much"  
"I'm glad you like it" He clears his throat. "I should….."  
"Yeah…"  
As I open the door to let him out he turns to me.  
"See you out there"  
I hesitate slightly before replying.  
"I just…I can't believe we're actually going to do this"  
He smiles warmly and takes my hand.  
"I can….whatever happens out there…..it's you and me…..okay?"  
"Okay….see you out there"

I shut the door and move back to my bed. Lying down, I hold the orchid carefully in my hand and, this time I fall peacefully into sleep.

_"…..positions….movement….the music starts….we begin our journey…" _

The rest is a blur, until I realise I'm lying on the ice with Chris holding onto my leg. Slowly, we get to our feet, and all I can hear is the roar of the audience. We don't look up to see the first set of marks, too busy collecting the sea of flowers that seem to have rained down onto the ice. Whilst skating back across the rink, the marks for artistic impression go up. Flanked by the flowers, Chris leans down to kiss my neck and whispers.  
"We did it"

It's later, much later, at the party for us when I realised that Chris and I had practically been together ever since we left the rink, but we hadn't had a minute alone. Suddenly, he grabs my arm.

"Go and get your coat" he says, in my ear.  
"What?"  
"Just do it?" he says, disappearing off through the crowd.  
I grab my coat and head back to the party. Chris is already standing by the door.  
"Here" he says, shoving some things into my hands. "Put these under your coat"  
I do as he says, confused, and I notice he's also hiding something.  
"What's going on?"  
He doesn't reply, just takes my hand. "Come on"

I allow him to lead me away from the party, but when he goes towards the doors to go outside I pull back.  
"Chris, what's going on?"  
"Nothing"  
"Then where are we going?"  
"Away." He waves a hand towards the party. "From all of this"  
I must of looked doubtful because he continued.  
"I can't stand all this….I just want to be with you. Alone"  
He had a point.  
"Okay" I say.

He grabs my hand back.  
"Good"  
We go out of the doors and the cold air hits me.  
"Are we going somewhere warm?" I enquire.  
"Sort of" he replies.  
We walk along a bit, then Chris steps off the path, onto the fresh, fallen snow.  
"Chris! Where on earth?!"  
"Don't worry" he says. "We're nearly there now"  
After about five minutes, I see where Chris is leading me. It's a small log cabin, near one of the skiing mountains.  
"Where did you find this?"  
"The other day…I didn't really think about it until now"  
He leads me inside, and we sit on one of the wooden benches.  
"Sorry, it's not very glamorous" he sighs. "I just feel that…that I haven't seen you since we….."  
"I know. I was thinking the same thing"  
He smiles at me warmly.  
"I thought we should have a little alone…..celebration" With that, he produces a bottle of champagne from under his coat.  
"Chris! Did you steal that?"  
"Steal….borrowed…..it doesn't matter, anyway it was our party…now where did you put those glasses?"  
"Oh right, is that what they were?" I say, fetching them out of my pockets. I sit them on the wooden table in front of us, while Chris pops the champagne.  
"Woah!" I say, as the champagne cork sails narrowly close to my head.  
"Oops, sorry"

Chris pours us both a drink and passes me mine. He holds his up and I do the same.  
"To us. To you"  
"And you….we did it together Chris. We did it"  
We both pause, and I take a long drink. A draft come through the door, which makes me shiver.  
"Are you cold?"  
"A bit"  
"Do you want to go back inside?"  
"No. Then I won't see you"  
A smile crosses his features and he holds out his arms to me.  
"Come here, I'll warm you up"  
I snuggle into his chest and he wraps his arms securely around me. We drink our champagne, and talk quietly, sometimes lapsing into a comfortable silence as we both dwell on the events of the day. Suddenly, feeling slightly brave from the champagne, an idea pops into my head.

"Chris?"  
"Hmmmm?"  
"I didn't give you anything"  
"For what?"  
"For Valentine's Day"  
"That's okay"  
"No. I want to give you something"  
I pull away from his arms.  
"What?" he looks puzzled.  
"This"

I look into his eyes and move towards him. My lips hesitantly meet his, and he kisses me back softly. His hands come up and tangle in my short hair as he deepens the kiss. Our tongues mesh together and I feel my heart racing as we continue to kiss, moulding our bodies together as we had done on the ice mere hours ago. As we break apart he leans his forehead against mine.

"Wow" he whispers. "That was…..the best Valentine's day present ever"  
I smile.  
"Happy Valentine's day Chris"  
"Not Valentine's day"  
"What?"  
"Bolero Day….it's Bolero day now"  
"Well then….happy Bolero day Chris"  
He moves back in to kiss me.  
"Happy Bolero day Jayne"


	4. Fight

_Valentines Fight (and make up)_

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Chris snapped, for what seemed like the hundredth time. We had returned from the British Championships, which we had only just won, and now we were deep into Olympic training. It was stressful for both of us, but I had got up that morning with a feeling that I'd never had before. It was the feeling that I didn't want to skate, and it was awful. Chris seemed to have picked up on it and had been off with me all day. It didn't help that the camera's, filming us for a documentary were trained on every move we made, and it didn't help that it was Bolero day, though neither of us had mentioned it. After Chris's outburst I skated off to the side of the rink, hoping for some peace, but it didn't happen.

"Great attitude Jayne!"  
I took out a tissue and blew my nose. I was beginning to get a headache. We skated back into the middle and kept on trying, but then we both snapped.  
"I've got no fucking sympathy!"  
That was it for me, they weren't tears that I had turned on for sympathy, they were tears of sheer frustration. Close to completely breaking down I stormed off the rink, passing by Andris without comment. I walked into the dressing room, slamming the door, and took my anger out on the horrid little microphone by banging it down on one of the tables. Then I sunk down onto one of the benches. My head was hurting, and Chris's comments were buzzing round it. I heard the door open, and his voice cut through the silence.

"We have to work"  
I lifted my eyes up.  
"I always have to be okay, and today I'm not. I don't want to be here!" I said it with venom in my voice, and he looked shocked. Then his eyes softened.  
"What's wrong?"  
"I just told you what was wrong"  
He looked bewildered. "What do you want me to do?"  
"Nothing. You can't _do_ anything"  
I bent down and started to undo my skates.  
"What are you doing?" he asked, furrowing his brow.  
"I'm going"  
"Jayne, come on…..don't….I'm sorry"  
"I can't cope with you being like this at the moment, and on today of all days!" I tried to walk past him, but he grabbed my hand.  
"Is this what this is about? The day? I've got you a….."

Angry that he didn't seem to understand I pulled my hand back.  
"No. It's not. But it's going to take more than a fucking orchid to make this right!" I rushed past him, and out of the rink as fast I could. Upon reaching my car I fling my skate bag in the back and collapse into the driver's seat. Suddenly I felt absolutely exhausted, both physically and mentally. All I wanted to do was to stop, and regroup my emotions, rest my aching body. I needed a break. We both did. It was strangely ironic, I thought on the drive home. Here we were, ten years on from our Olympic win, tearing pieces out of each other in order to try and get another medal. It all seemed so much _[i]harder_[/i] this time around. Not that Bolero was easy…but….I didn't know. I suppose we were younger back then…there wasn't so much at stake.

Pulling up at my house I felt relieved. Hopefully now I could go to bed and recharge for a while. I got out, collected my things and headed inside. I grabbed some painkillers, and a glass of water and went upstairs to try and sleep off my headache. I fell asleep quickly, into a dreamless sleep however I was awoken a couple of hours later by the phone ringing. I turned around to see Chris's name flash on the caller id. I ignored it. Then my mobile rang. I ignored that too, and tried to get back off to sleep. It didn't happen. Fifteen minutes later the doorbell rang. I debated ignoring it too, but then I remembered that Chris had a key so I hauled myself out of bed and slipped my dressing gown on. My head was pounding as I made my way down the stairs. I already guessed it would be Chris but his silhouette at my door confirmed it. I opened it to find him standing there, looking worried.

"You didn't answer the phone"  
I say nothing and lean against the door frame. He casts his eyes over me, frowning. "Are you okay?"  
"Truthfully? No, not really. I'm so tired, and I've got this terrible headache."  
His eyes softened, and for the first time since we'd started our training it was like he was _really_ looking at me. As my best friend, as my partner, and everything that we were to each other.  
"Did you take something?"  
I rubbed my forehead. "Yeah. Didn't work though. I think it's mainly stress."  
"Not helped by me no doubt." He smiled weakly. "I've got some stronger ones in my car if you want them?"  
"Please"  
"Go in and sit down, I'll be in in a minute"

I was fully expecting him to leave after he gave me the pills so I was surprised when he pulled a chair out next to me at the kitchen table. I took the pills, and when I looked up, Chris was gazing at me.  
"What's wrong?" I asked.  
"I'm just really sorry about earlier….you look really worn out."  
"So I look like crap?"  
He ignored that comment. "I'm going to run you a bath. Wait here" He stood up and placed a kiss on my forehead before heading upstairs.

As soon as I relaxed into the bath, letting the warm water wash over my aching limbs I began to feel all the tension, and my headache melting away. Whether it was the resolution of my argument with Chris, or the painkillers, I couldn't be sure, but after nearly an hour of bathing I felt much better. I pulled on my robe, and as I made my way downstairs a delicious smell hit me. Pushing open the kitchen door I was shocked to see Chris stirring away at something on the stove, and the table set beautifully with flowers, wine and candles.

"What did you do?"  
Chris spun around and blushed slightly.  
"Um….earlier you said that…an orchid wouldn't fix anything, so I'm trying to make up for earlier" He crossed the kitchen and put his arms around my waist. "Am I forgiven?" I laughed slightly and moved deep into his arms.  
"Yes. And I'm sorry too"  
"Are you feeling better?"  
"Yes. Much, thank you"

We stood hugging for a while, each of us silently forgiving the other for all the cross words said over the past few days. Chris broke it by tugging on my hand  
"Come on, sit down. Dinner's nearly ready" He led me to the table. "Wine?" he asked.  
"Is that wise? We have training tomorrow"  
He sat down and poured me a glass anyway. "Actually….we don't. What happened earlier shouldn't have happened. And you're exhausted" he paused. "I couldn't see that before. I can see it now. You need a break…..we both do…so I phoned Andris….we're not training…just for a couple of days. I think we need to go back to just being us….you know?"  
I knew exactly. Chris continued. "And I know…its ten years….and I haven't bought you a proper present so we're going shopping tomorrow and you can pick anything…."

He stopped as I suddenly flew onto his lap, hugging him fiercely.  
"No…..just this…this is the only present I need"  
"Okay…okay" he whispered, running his hands up and down my back. I pulled back, only to lean back in too kiss him softly.  
"Bolero kiss" I whisper to him. He leans over me, and pulls out a flower from the bunch on the table before giving it to me.  
"Bolero orchid"  
I lean in and kiss him again.  
"Happy tenth anniversary Chris"  
He smiles "Happy anniversary Jayne"


	5. Apart

_Apart_

The alarm blears in my ear at 8.00am, stirring me out of sleep. Phil turns over to whisper into my ear.  
"Time to get up"  
"No way. Turn it off. I'm retired now remember. That means I don't have to get up at these silly hours"  
"I know, I just thought you might want to get up early on…..Valentine's Day"  
Phil would never call it Bolero Day, he knew all too well that it was a private thing between Chris and I. Unfortunately, this was the first year that Chris and I would be spending it apart. Phil knew this, of course, which meant that he would probably be over-compensating. I didn't want to disappoint him but all I wanted to do was stay in bed and pretend that Bolero day wasn't happening this year.

Phil's voice snaps me back to reality.  
"Jayne?"  
"Hmmmm?"  
"Do you want to get up now?"  
"No" comes my stern reply. Phil sighs.  
"I know you're in a mood with Chris, but please don't take it out on me"  
I flip over onto my back and stare at the ceiling. "I'm not in a mood _with_ Chris"  
"Okay, you're in a mood _about_ Chris then"  
There was a pause.  
"I know that's it's not an important anniversary or anything, and I know that he's just found out that Jill's pregnant, and doesn't want to leave her because her morning sickness is bad, and I know that we didn't exactly plan anything. He's probably forgotten anyway I haven't heard from him and….what is America anyway? forwards or backwards…I can never remember"

I took a breath. I hadn't intended to say so much, and I turned my head towards Phil. "Sorry. I know it's our Valentine's Day together too, it's just that….."  
"It's fine. I know that it's really your day"  
I kiss Phil softly. "Thank you, for being so understanding"  
"It's no problem, I'm used to it" He smiles ruefully. "Look, he won't have forgotten, you two speak every day, and the postman hasn't been yet"  
Phil had a point. "Look" he continues. "I made us lunch reservations….if you're going to be up for it?"  
I felt bad, here was my husband trying to give me everything I wanted, and all I wanted was another man. "Of course I'm up for it"  
"Good" He moved to get out of bed. "I'll leave you to sleep for another couple of hours"  
He leaves the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I manage to drift off, gaining another couple of hours until I vaguely recognise the sound of the doorbell and Phil talking. Somewhere in the middle of sleep and waking, convinced that I'm not dreaming I wrestle my eyes open. I hear the door shut and I wait to see if there's anything for me. After a few minutes I hear Phil coming up the stairs. He pushes the door open and peers round it.

"You're awake" he says, opening the door fully.  
"Yeah" I say, sitting up. "I just woke up"  
He walks into the room and I see that he's carrying a mug of tea, and a package.  
"The postman just brought this for you" he says, setting the tea on the side and handing the package to me.  
"Thanks"  
Phil hovers for a moment. "I'll…I'll leave you to it"  
"Thanks"

I pick up the package. It's long and thin, wrapped up in parcel tape and brown paper. Carefully, I peel back the tape to reveal a plastic box, with an orchid inside.  
"He still….." I say softly as tears spring to my eyes and the past rushes back to me all at once. Suddenly I'm back in the Sarajevo hotel room with Chris standing awkwardly in front of me.  
"Oh Chris" I sigh. As I'd been admiring the orchid I hadn't noticed an envelope flutter down onto the bed. I spied it now, and put the orchid down. The envelope was plain, with only one word written on it. My name, in Chris's unmistakeable handwriting. I opened it, thinking it was a card, but a letter fell out.  
_  
__"Dear Jayne, greetings from Colorado"_ it began. Forgetting all about my tea I read on.  
_"Happy Bolero day, can you really believe it's been so many years? I bet you're looking at the orchid now, remembering the moment I gave it to you"_

I had to laugh. Chris knew me so well.  
_"I'm sorry it's not a real orchid, but they don't allow you to send flowers overseas" _

I paused. I felt that Chris had paused before writing more.

_"I'm even more sorry that I can't be with you today. I hope you understand why. I'm so excited about becoming a father. Well, excited and terrified. I know that you and Phil will make wonderful godparents. And I can't wait for you to come to Colorado to meet him or her. I know we talk on the phone every day, but it's time for me to admit….it's really not the same. I miss you. I miss our every days together. I know that we'll always have each other, no matter how far away we are from each other. We are too important in each others' lives for us not to be. I love you Jayne, always and forever."_

I put the letter down, completely overwhelmed by emotion. I held the orchid close to me and cried, shedding tears for his lovely words, tears because of what day it was, and tears because I just wanted him back with me. After a while I pulled myself together and sent Chris a text.

_"I know it's early…or late. But can we webchat?" _He replied instantly.  
_"Of course, just give me ten minutes" _

Quickly I pulled on some clothes and fixed my hair. I went downstairs to Phil, and found him in the kitchen reading the paper.

"Hey" I say, and he looks up.  
"Are you okay?"  
"Yes, I'm just going to webchat with Chris for a bit"  
"Okay, don't forget about lunch though"

I promised not too and went into the study. I turned the computer on and clicked the link to webchat and waited for him to respond. I didn't have to wait long until his tired, but happy face filled the screen. His hair looked rumpled, as if he'd been in bed.

"Hi" I say. "Did I wake you?"  
"Yes" he said smiling. "But it doesn't matter. I take it you got my Bolero day presents?"  
"Yes, they were lovely" I half smiled. "Especially the letter" I felt tearful and Chris noticed.  
"Are you okay? I didn't upset you did I?"  
"No…not in a bad way anyway….look…I wrote you a letter back. Just let me read it"  
His voice was soft and understanding.  
"I'm here, I'm listening"  
I uncrumpled the piece of paper in my hand.

_"Dear Chris"_ I started. _"Happy Bolero Day. Every year, when you give me an orchid, I always flash back to you giving me the first ever one, when you were younger then you were now, and still slightly awkward around me at times. We're nothing like that with each other now, and our friendship still continues to grow, even though we are apart. I still have all the orchids….sort of anyway. I press them….I don't think I ever told you that. Anyway, I think back to that day, and the way we were, and the way we are now…..us both married…and trying for" _

My voice cracked. _"Children"_  
"Jayne"  
I couldn't look up for the tears.  
"Jayne please look at me"  
I couldn't so I just carried on reading.

_"That's not to say that I'm not happy for you and Jill, you know that I am….I just" _

I put the paper down and looked at him.  
"I just wish you weren't so far away, it's just not…it's not…"  
"It's not the same" he said wistfully. I was silent for a while, trying to will the tears away. Then I heard his voice.  
"Just say the word Jayne, I'll get on the next plane"  
I smiled through my tears.  
"You can't do that…what about Jill?"  
"I'm sure she'd cope" he said.  
"I would never ask you to do that though"  
"I know. I just need you to know that if you needed me there Jayne, I'd come"  
"I do know that. And I need you to know that no matter how far away from me you go, and even if we don't hardly see each other...I will still always love you"  
"Me too Jayne"

There was quiet for a moment.  
"Where's my present?"  
I laughed. "You're not here, you can't have your kiss this year!"  
Chris pretended to pout. "That's not fair, you still got your orchid!" I blew him a kiss towards the screen.  
"Happy?"  
"No…you need to kiss the screen" I giggled.  
"No!"  
"Come on Jayne…for me"  
"Go on then, seeing as it's you"  
"Go on three and I'll move towards the screen"  
Laughing I said "One….two…three" and we both moved towards the screen.  
"Now that's better!"  
"If you were here, I'd smack you on the arm for making me do that!"  
"If I was there you wouldn't of had to do that in the first place"  
"True"

We chatted for a while longer until I heard Phil calling me, reminding me about getting ready for lunch.  
"I need to go"  
"Why, does your other man want you"  
I smiled. "Yes, and don't call him that"  
"Why…it's true, I was your man first" he says impishly.  
"Don't let Jill hear you saying that" I retorted.  
"Why? She knows you're my number one girl"  
"Well I'm proud to hold that title….Right…time to go"  
"Love you Jayne…..always and forever…We'll be together for Bolero day next year, I promise"  
"I can't wait….love you too…always and forever"


End file.
